I just got some bad news. As this school vacation comes to a close, I just learned that there is—-yes—another impending vacation, in April! That’s less than two months from now! Y’all, that is downright cruel. I have sat here all week, taking photos on my couch, looking at gorgeous pics of cheer in Florida, Canada, Turks n’ Caicos, and the New Hampshire mountains, and I finally powered through to Sunday! Now, I find out that this same thing is happening in a mere seven weeks? NO! I can’t do it!
But, maybe I can! Maybe this stay-cation has been a real eye-opener for me.
My week hasn’t been bad, actually. In fact, I’ve had fun with my kids doing, well, really nothing. I’ve learned to enjoy some of the simple things, like when the bath water turns purple with a Crayola bath ball. Or, when we bust open an LOL doll and find out that it’s an Ultra Rare one (like Baby Yin, the Ying/Yang little brother).
I’ve also learned some other interesting things, like heating up grilled NY Sirloin Steak on day two really feels like you’re chewing on a tire and doesn’t taste good, no matter how much A1 you put on it.
I learned that I should not sit down with hot coffee in my hand, unless it has a lid, because the dog will jump up on me and spill scalding java down my leg and stain my cushions, which are now in the washer on “delicate.” I also learned I don’t know what the hell setting to wash cushion covers on.
I learned I really love the “Love Songs” channel on Pandora, especially that “Once I was 7-years-old” song by Lukas Graham that makes me feel decrepit and like my life is whizzing by.
I also learned that you should try on tank top blouses from Target before purchasing them, because you might just end up with a midriff, something you wouldn’t be caught dead in after two children.
I learned that I might actually be over the show The Bachelor. Like, I might have aged out, and I’m a little startled by this. It’s kind of like a bad breakup, with all the bachelors, really, and Bachelor Nation, because I’ve been with them for almost 20 years. I’m over it.
I learned that you can’t scrape plaque off the inside of your son’s teeth with a fork, and you might have to go to the dentist.
I learned that I need a handyman to come for like fifteen hours and fix the multitude of things that are broken in my house, including the light fixture in my kitchen that I unscrewed to change the bulb, and it broke and now looks like a deadly live wire.
Vacation was actually quite enlightening I realize now. Perhaps I should look forward to another great life study in April, a mere….seven weeks away!